Hull and East Riding Councils assured school meals don't contain horse meat

“I would be more worried if the kids had been drinking coke or eating a mars bar each day,a bit of horse meat is the last thing to worry about in schoolkids diet.”

“Probably better than usual meals”

“"Hull City Council has obtained assurances from our sole supplier..."

Are they on about seahorse meat then?

Something a bit fishy here.”

“[comment continued] ... Afterwards, the slaves destroyed all supposedly genuine scripture relating to this belief, and agreed to never speak of it again. Giant Sphynx's would be the only true remainder of the times. A handful of people chose to pass the story down through the generations though, and to this day there are families who still believe that humans can indeed become what they eat. The term 'Eagle-Eyed' is the very reason that particular bird of prey is an endangered species, and there is a direct correlation between the use of 'crocodile tears' in common language and the dwindling number of crocodiles across the globe. It is also the reason we don't eat cats anymore, and why they now treat humans like the utter *******s we are. The joint UK/US research was inconclusive as far as fact was concerned, but their discovery of this myth led them to believe there was more behind the phrase, "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse" than first thought. They somehow bumbled to the conclusion that the phrase began life as "I need to jump so high I should eat a horse", causing them to secretly introduce horse meat into everyday diets where ever possible as a means of, quite literally, getting 'the jump' on any encroaching enemy forces when the time came. Reports claim soldiers were capable of leaping some 20-foot in the air during WW2, but evidence is inconclusive. Some of those Egyptian descendants are still in power across the EU, and still believe that harnessing horse power is our best chance to become more powerful. Hence why even our cars are measured on "horse power". We are usually secretly fed a lot of horse whenever an attack is predicted, just to prepare us. This recent spurt is a measure of protection against potential alien visitors following the Mayan prophecy. Others will be blamed and it will pass. Fact.”

“This whole equine affair is a conspiracy of epic (pro)portions (harf harf!). However, to think it is a mistake we're being fed this horse meat is to admit utter ignorance towards the history of mankind's evolution. It is a well known, albeit little documented, fact that the US and UK governments joined forces in the pre-war early 1900's to determine the source of the famous phrase, "You are what you eat", and discovered a legend dictating that every human had the ability to shape-shift into the animals they consume, assuming the animal had the correct balance of nutrients and led a life that put them into the positive Karma zone. By being a good animal, apparently we could unlock their potential ourselves, taking on their form whenever we wish. This common myth is well documented along the walls of Egyptian pyramids, where ancient hieroglyphs depict man grooming, consuming, and transforming into cat like creatures while the women stand by and watch, ready to wash the dishes afterwards - a tougher challenge than it sounds in the pre-Fairy Liquid days. Mistranslated texts depict felines as god like creatures during the Egyptian rising, but in actual fact they were groomed and forced into a life of obedience and kindness, often ritually performing acts of self sacrifice to reaffirm their place on the positive side of Karmic alignment. Many cats were consumed, but nobody showed signs of transformation, beyond people occasionally pretending to purr a bit while rubbing their cheeks on the side of pyramids. When the great prince Imohtep came into power and adopted this methodology as his religion, he was disheartened to discover scriptures confirming the belief of human shape-shifting to be false. Knowing the power religion holds, he attempted to deceive his followers by one day emerging from his home wearing a realistic cat mask, which was made using the skin of the dead with patches of pubic hair tossed on for realistic effect. It worked a little too well. The slaves were so scared at the sight of their now half-feline leader that they killed and burned him on sight, melting the mask to his fiery flesh as if it was an actual part of his face...”

“Contacted
Suppliers have they.
Asda and all the others thought they were safe from horse meat because they asked their suppliers.”

“Contacted their suppliers to seek assurances have they?. Thats about as reassuring as toothache when the recent news shows the tricks and cons some crooked suppliers and distributors have been up to. Only recently, a well known supermarkets own brand lager was tested and found to contain 95 per cent horse wee.”