'Rehab saved my life': Hull City legend Dean Windass on depression, drink-driving and working in a charity shop
HULL City legend Dean Windass says rehab stopped him killing himself.
The Tigers hero insists he "wouldn't be here today" if he had not sought help to tackle depression.
Fans were shocked when Deano admitted trying to take his life twice after struggling with his father's death, the collapse of his marriage and life after Hull City.
Despite undergoing treatment for depression, he went on a drinking binge and was caught drunk at the wheel of his car in October.
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Now working in a charity shop as part of his court-ordered community payback, Dean said: "Without the rehab, I wouldn't be here today after I was caught drink-driving. It would have tipped me over the edge.
"There is no way I can justify or defend what I did.
"I promise I will never do anything like that again."
In January, Dean tried to commit suicide twice following the break-up of his 18-year marriage and the death of his father.
Dean spent 26 days in the Sporting Chance clinic in Hampshire after revealing his battle with depression.
However, he was then convicted of drink-driving in October after crashing his car while nearly three times over the limit.
Dean crashed his silver Mercedes into a parked car in Bradford as he drove back to his home in the outskirts of Leeds after watching Hull City's defeat to Blackpool.
Police found him asleep at the wheel of his car at 5am on October 3 and arrested him.
Dean has been banned from driving for two years and four months.
The magistrates described his conduct as "very serious", ordering him to carry out 250 hours' unpaid community work.
Dean has been working at a charity shop as part of his community service as well as part-time for a fixings supply firm in Hull.
He said: "I am working at the Scope charity shop in Bingley as part of my community service.
"I am now working three days a week for Quality Fixings and it gives me something to get up for.
"I am learning different things and meeting new people.
Dean admits he still drinks but insists he does not have a problem.
He said: "I am not an alcoholic. I like a drink, like every working man. Before, I was drinking to block things out but now I just have a few beers socially with my friends."
Spending time in rehab has put his life into perspective and Dean realises he needs to be there for his family.
He said: "I feel I am stronger, mentally. I don't let things affect me like I used to.
"Having moved to Hull, I really miss my kids. Losing my licence has made it difficult to see them.
"But I have to get on with my life and I see them when I can.
"I will always be their dad and I'll be there for them."
He says 2012 has been his toughest year but he is looking ahead to a better time in 2013.
"I'm not saying I'm cured because I'm not," he says. "I have good days and bad days.
"The day I was caught drink-driving was a bad time. I was back binge drinking. Crashing my car and getting caught drink-driving was a big wake-up call for me."