“Cool story brother.”

“lets hope so after the 2 years lol”

“im still waiting for feed back from our councillours on what is happening towards my said boxing club
crb is sent off and a couple of courses are booked ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,onwards and upwards watch dis space”

“Wozza1968 maybe you could double up as a punchbag. You appear to be of similar proportions and twice as ugly.

pmsl”

“wozza

This isn't Twitter you know. It's a discussion site not a 'let's tell everyone what is happening in wozza's life' site.”

“My guess is that wozza1968 is attempting to justify himself as 'mainstream'.”

“Considering Wozza's bigoted outlook upon life, I wouldn't let him anywhere near a group of children.

He could hardly be classed as a role model to be looked up to.”

“and why is that mr moose??????????????????????????????”

“Because you do not understand the meaning of the word equity. The views of many youngsters have been corrupted by bigots like yourself.”

“wozza

How much did your CRB check cost?”

“7 whole pounds in new money”

“The standard CRB check costs £26. is yours dodgy Wozza?”

“Fish. Barrel. That is all.”

“er no it was 7 quid ,,,i think u need to go and get your facts first ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
and wots a fish barrel ???????????????”

“Well my friend's daughter has just gone to a Hull teaching supply agency and they have charged her £50 for a CRB check.

I will tell her to get back to them and demand £43 back.



"and wots a fish barrel ???????????????"

Priceless! Oh and jenoh, do you know what 'suppost kids' means??????????????????????????”

“wozza

Who applied for your CRB check because, according to the government:

"individuals can't legally apply for a criminal record check on themselves. This is because they are unable to assess their own suitability for a job"

http://tinyurl.com/3l3f4nu”

“i filled the forms in and off they went and i got charged 7 bar so i cant comment on your said friend ,,,,





so wot is a fish barrel ???????????????”

“wozza

"so wot is a fish barrel ???????????????"

It's something you understand through being educated, something which you say you have no need for.”

“Wozza,

I`ve checked my "facts" and they are still the same,

New fee levels

From 6 April 2011, the following fee levels will apply throughout the remainder of 2011/12.

Enhanced CRB check £44.00 (previously £36)
Standard CRB check £26.00
ISA Adult First check £6.00

I don`t post guess work on here, only facts that can be backed up.

One more thing, what are you talking about `new money`? You would have been 3 or 4 years old when we changed to decimal so can have had no memory of `old` money.”

“flossy

CRB checks for volunteers are supposed to be free, though you might have to pay a processing charge (the £7?) to the organisation you are volunteering for.

But as far as we know - and we are being kept up to date by wozza - the organisation hasn't been set up yet. Perhaps he isn't including us in all the loops????????????????????????????????”

“Imagine_that,

Anything that brings you in direct contact with children, whether volunteering or not means you have to have at least the standard CRB check. Personally I would have thought that the close personal contact required for a boxing club would require an enhanced CRB check.”

“flossy

Oh yes, he will certainly need an enhanced check.

But then he says that it's the start of a two year project and the CRB will be out of date by then anyway!

Nothing makes sense, so no change there then.”

“Jenoh may post under another name on the HDM Rugby League forum.

'Shooting fish in a barrel' is often used to emphasise when one believes he/she has triumphed over others!”

“I do not and that's not quite what I meant but thanks for trying to explain something to wozza.

Fog. Knitting. That is all.”

“Wozza,

No way am I saying sorry to you for being RIGHT.
My information came from the Home Office, check out the link.

http://tinyurl.com/7fqwe6a

And how do you know that Imagine_that doesn`t know what fish, barrel means?
She hasn`t said anything about it.”

“wozza

Of course I no(sic) what fish/barrel means but what is the point of me telling you as you don't believe a word I say. I explained why KC doesn't have a monopoly in Hull (along with mungkeh_Boy and a few others of course) and you ignored it so why waste time on you?

As for "was you getting excited when you thought i got wozza here " , we get wozza so many times on these forums that we would be in a permanent state of agitation if we let it affect us each time.”

“as long as you are happy laters”

“once again, I haven't got a clue what he is saying.”

“Another black hole in this discussion forum? Cara_1951 where are you????????????????????????????”

“still waiting for the crb dont they take there time ..........................”

“Wow - thanks for that wozza. I couldn't sleep for wondering what stage you were at with the CRB.”

“im still waiting”

“wozza

Are you going to be posting on here every other day saying that you haven't go your CRB check back?

You are so desperate for attention aren't you?”

“Wozza,

The criminal records bureau is inundated with requests. Since the government brought in stricter rules a couple of years ago, thousands of people need to apply every week. Not only that, people that are already working in the jobs that need checks, have to have them updated. This has caused massive backlogs in the service.

I don`t think just over a week is very long to wait really, do you?”

“flossy

My friend's daughter was told it could take up to 2 months.

I don't know what his hurry is anyway, they don't have a club yet!”

“It could take an awful long time. It is likely to take months to decipher his details. I hope he remembered to give his address in case they give up and ask him to try again.

Then he has to be considered suitable to supervise young boys. If he is, he had better keep his bigoted views to himself.

All of this of course presuming he isn't making this up. With regard to Colin, I (and others) have used the term 'attention seeking' before.”

“A_M

Well there's hardly any need to rush is there? He is hardly likely to get the building he is expecting the council to give him for free.

He talks about 'we', so unless he is using the royal we, other people are also involved. I wonder why they don't feel the need to start forums on the subject too, or even post on this one?”

“a phone call is in order come tomorrow me thinks ?????????????????????????????”

“Yes ring them! How dare they not get in touch with you at 8:50am on a Sunday!”

“See what I mean? We answer him and explain and he takes not the blind bit of notice.

When he put the CRB check in it must have been explained to him how long they take.”

“wot is fish barrel ?”

“wot is fish barrel ?”

“Wozza, I think I love you”

“wozza

harbourlites has already told you - six days ago.”

“Imagine_that, Colin posted:

"a phone call is in order come tomorrow me thinks ?????????????????????????????"

Perhaps there is only one CRB clerk (on the minimum wage of course.) He/she could be inundated with bogus requests to start boxing clubs. These thing do take time.”

“so wot is a fish barrell jenho ??”

“A_M

You know that Colin is the most important thing in his world and when he requests something - be it a free council building from councillors that he despises or a CRB check from a minimum wage FEMALE clerk, they had better jump to it.”

“http://tinyurl.com/co8bfx8”

“Yes but he's German, what's wozza's excuse?”

“Anon_Geof, loved it! Here's me thinking that the Germans are all super-efficient, looks like they have an equivalent to Wozza.

Like shooting cake in a barrel Wozza, you can't have your fish and eat it. (Almost) pmsl lol”

“A_M

Wozza hasn't come on to update us on what the CRB lady told him when he rang up this morning.

I am pacing the room with worry ... do you think they still have him on hold?”

“wozza - you've probably worked it out by now, but if not then I'm sorry, but I'm putting my foot down. I refuse to provide an explanation until you spell my name correctly.

It's only five letters for heaven's sake. Unless you're making an hilarious joke. jen-ho. As in "*****". In which case "ah ha ha." Very good. Full marks. Moving on...”

“Gods-Dammit! W.h.o.r.e. Flippin' 'eck HDM I'm trying to have a conversation here! Eff off with your asterisks!”

“Stick to the point Jonah.

Anyway, to clarify. The 'Fish Barrel' is a boxing term (I imagine people assumed you would be aware of this)

Not widely used, it gained some fame during depression era America. Michael 'Fishy' Farquaharson was the latest Big White Hope to challenge for a heavyweight title. Although born in Glasgow, he had joined the Navy and the majority of his early career was spent in money fights around the ports of the Atlantic. At some point, he had fish tattooed on his arms, hence his nickname. There was a cod. Maybe a stingray. All that.

After delivering a particularly strong performance in St Louis (it was never quite explained how, or why the Navy were there) he was picked up by a promoter desperate to get any fighter who could last more than two rounds against the champion (whose name, sadly, is lost to me).

Anyway... He took a beating and was taking a standing count. The champion whose name eludes me was up on the ropes taking the applause of the crowd. With a final burst of energy Fishy barrelled forward and knocked him out of the ring.

The referee called foul. The Big White Hope was dashed once again. The Fish Barrel was born - 'A last ditch effort at respectability which results in failure.'”

“Dammez-vous Geoff! I was hoping to keep the mystery going but no. You have to wade in with your history and facts and that.

How very dare you!

Anyway, I bet you can't provide a link to this story on wikichu***. It's almost like you just made it up. Link or it didn't happen.”

“Oh for crying out loud! How is an acronym that forms part of a word offensive?!

wikichuf.f.s. This is a conspiracy...”

“nice 1”

“Anytime Wozza.

Now, about this CRB?”

“Jonah

Yes I had this trouble with naming two words that sound the same but are spelt differently and have different meanings.

h o m ophones.”

“Small world Wozza

Just met someone from Hull and got talking (as you do) and it transpires they know you and reckon you are rather infamous for being a WUM. I like it...I like it a lot XD”

“so wot iz a wum???!!!!!????”

“pippa1951

How did the conversion get to the point where members of this forum were dicussed?

Because, you know, it sounds like you're making it up. A sort of Emperor's New Clothes thing.

I doubt there would be the little outbursts and rants if he was the genius you are trying to present him as.”

“mungkeh_Boy

Well said - or should it be, well posted?”

“Pippa1951

"Small world ... Just met someone from Hull "

Wow yes isn't it? And guess what? I met someone from Hull today too. In fact I met quite a few people from Hull. I went into three shops and the shop assistants were all from Hull, as were the drivers on the 4 buses I have used plus the other dog walkers in East Park this morning.

Yes, it certainly is a small world meeting someone from Hull.”

“Anon_Geoff

WUM- wind up merchant according to Google.

Well I must admit, when I first started to read wozza's posts I thought they were a joke. I believe that a number of other posters new to the forums thought that they were a joke too - one even stated it was April 1st (as if it was the only day he'd ever posted like that). Because, let's face it, how can anyone have the views and beliefs that wozza has?

But he has been posting like this since September 2011 with never a let up on his idiocy and quite a while ago I realised that the only joke in his postings is wozza himself.

And look at the way pippa_1951 addresses him. She talks to him as if he is a special needs 3 year old. She knows he's not a WUM too but she has set out her stall on his side and NOTHING will ever make her change her mind.”

“so wot is google???!!!!??

(ad infinitum)

I met someone from Hull. He had never heard of any of you.

Losers.”

“To be a successful WUM takes intelligence among other things. Colin also posts his cretinous garbage on Twitter. He is happy to put his name and photo to it. No normal person would demean themselves in such a way.

Poor Pippa, attempting to be a WUM herself. She is intelligent enough but but totally fails in the application. XD”

“Pippa is searching for her lost youth (if she was ever young, which seems doubtful looking at her photo) by using text speak or urban slang or whatever it is.”

“BUT we still don't know what happened with wozza's Monday phone call re his CRB check.

I won't rest until he comes back with his update - is it on Twitter A_M?”

“mungkeh_Boy

I am somewhat taken aback. I thought you would've used your Imagine_that persona first.

In answer to your question:
"How did the conversion(sic) get to the point where members of this forum were dicussed?"(sic)

So sorry, I forgot to say I am currently in sunnier climes and the someone from Hull I referred to mentioned he was going to use the hotel internet "Cos I like to know what's going on in England" and one thing led to another (as it does)

"Yes, it certainly is a small world meeting someone from Hull"

So sorry, I forgot to say I am currently in sunnier climes and the someone from Hull I referred to mentioned he was going to use the hotel internet "Cos I like to know what's going on in England" and one thing led to another (as it does)

PS My youth was never lost. Hopefully, I've a few more years left yet before my early morning dog walking days begin lol & lol”

“ahhh the fame ,,,, have a nice hols pip ,,,,,and dont forget my stick of rock lol ?????????????
im in the system ,,,,eg i have to wait for when da fuzz gets to my crb ,,,,,,
onwards and upwards ......................................”

“pippa1951

You will never have early morning dog walking days because you stay up all night trying to work out percentage calculations and are certainly not young enough to burn the candle at both ends.

You must really have lost it if you think that getting up early and going out with the dog is a sign of not being fit and healthy. Did I mention that we run most of the way?”

“munkeh_Boy

I hope that you are as amused as I am that pippa_1951 thinks that we are the same person!

She is quite old and very forgetful, and her eyes are failing so she obviously missed our long, protracted argument from a few weeks ago. She's even written the same paragraph twice in her post as in:

"So sorry, I forgot to say I am currently in sunnier climes and the someone from Hull I referred to mentioned he was going to use the hotel internet "Cos I like to know what's going on in England" and one thing led to another (as it does)"

and then

"So sorry, I forgot to say I am currently in sunnier climes and the someone from Hull I referred to mentioned he was going to use the hotel internet "Cos I like to know what's going on in England" and one thing led to another (as it does)"



Obviously we have found some common ground since; only pippa_1951 would create multiple personalities that argue with each other.

But then, she is so used to being in conflict with everyone that she can't believe that two posters can actually agree on anything.”

“pippa_1951

"PS My youth was never lost. Hopefully, I've a few more years left yet before my early morning dog walking days begin lol & lol"

No, but you go to 'sunnier climes' posting on the HDM forums.

How SAD is that?”

“Gosh Imagine_that, that was a long rant;-)”

“Imagine_that

"I hope that you are as amused as I am that pippa_1951 thinks that we are the same person!"

Nope, just offended.”

“CT007

Take away the abuse, insults and quotes from Shakespeare/Curtis/Elton and you don't have a lot to contribute on here do you?”

“mungkeh_Boy

Well maybe I don't take comments on here as seriously as you do, but I hope that you make it clear to her that we are not the same poster.”

“flossy

from pippa1951

"In answer to your question:
"How did the conversion(sic) get to the point where members of this forum were dicussed?"(sic)"

And we're the 'nit picking saddos' for complaining about wozza's spelling. That's if 'wozza's spelling' isn't an oxymo ron of course'

(Left a space in oxymo ron in case the HDM stars the word moron out)”

“You can almost hear the sleeves being rolled up can't you? Anyone need me to hold their coat?”

“You can almost hear the sleeves being rolled up can't you? Anyone need me to hold their coat?”

“Monkey_Boy

"IT will falsely accuse others of racism"

Please provide a link to this.”

“jenoh

And the REALLY sad thing is, he liked me when I was posting as 'inthedogshed' ;oD”

“Ding-ding!

Seconds away, round two!”

“pippa_1951

And you know I'm not mungkeh_Boy because

! can spell
I have never called you a crab, in or out of a bucket!”

“pippa_mia

Just thought - another reason I'm not mungkeh_Boy is, I never once thought that you were 'making it up' when you said someone abroad (well you didn't actually say abroad which made your comment so silly) had heard of wozza.

I know how obsessed you are with him and it would be completely reasonable for you to talk about him where ever you go. You probably have his photo printed out and in a frame by your bed.”

“Imagine_that

Please show where I say multiple accounts bother me...”

“Oh Wozza look what you've started now! Are you a WUM ? Perhaps you post under different names too!
Imagine_ that perhaps you should apply for the job as editor of this site as it seems that most of your time is spent reading analysing and criticising comments.”

“well just been told the form has not been sent from this end ,,,,,,,aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.......”

“now wot have i done ,,,,,, i aint blumin wrote nowt ????????????????????????”

“Wozza

How did you pay for the crb? ie what method of payment?

Is it anything that can be used as proof they have received your application? (Assuming they did.)”

“I believe that Wozza did not apply for a CRB and is telling porkies. He appears to crave attention to make up for the fact that he 'doesn't fit in'. lol”

“Pippa, I see your holiday in the Sun hasn't improved your perception.

I did not say Wozza is a WUM. He does not wind me up, I doubt if he could wind up a clock. Posting his attention seeking, bigoted, views on this forum cannot be classed as a 'normal' wind up. I respond because I dislike his hate filled posts (mostly removed by the HDM administrator.) Yes, I also poke fun at his feeble attempts to converse, amd as I have said before, if he is willing to meet others halfway and make an effort, he will get a more encouraging response. Many have tried to instill this into him and failed.

Imagine_that and Flossy quite easily stand on their own feet and do so successfully. Along with other posters when they challenged Wozza's idiotic statements. He has never come back with a sensible argument. The reason for this is because he is incapable of doing so.

You have taken it upon yourself to be his champion. Good luck to you, his sexist insults are aimed at you too, I bet he laughs every time you post in his defence.

Wozza is a figure of fun and is treated accordingly.”

“yep fella ,,its all good now eveerything on da way ,,,,,,again lol,,,,
pip ,,, just do wot i do ignore the people who are not nice .......simples”

“All of this aside please can someone tell me if wozza has really been given a free building for this boxing club? If so which councillor has backed him?”

“no to the first and second questions ....................................”

“Wozza1968 please re post this message in English.

by wozza1968Friday, June 15 2012, 7:53AM
"yep fella ,,its all good now eveerything on da way ,,,,,,again lol,,,,
pip ,,, just do wot i do ignore the people who are not nice .......simples"”

“Wozza, you posted:

" just do wot i do ignore the people who are not nice .......simples"

Do you recall referring to me as a 'Batty Boy'?

You are a fraud.”

“Just seen your post Apollo

So you can call Wozza everything under the sun and you get upset when he calls you "Batty Boy"

Does that mean gay ?

What's wrong with being gay ?

Are you homophobic by any chance ?”

“Pippa - you don't have to lIterally be the subject in order to be offended by the word. I'm fairly broad minded but I find the "N" word offensive.

Does that mean Afro-Caribean? Yes.

What's wrong with being Afro-Caribean? Nothing.

Are you racist by any chance? No.”

“Jenoh

So constantly and I stress, constantly being the subject of words such as cretin, moron, idiot, plankton is acceptable then ?

And no.......I'm not racist. In fact I'm against any form of bullying”

“A very weak reply Pippa, if you consider yourself to be Wozza's 'Lapdog' you will have to do much better than that!

By the way, I'm against all forms of Bigotry as you will no doubt have gathered by now. Hence my approach to Wozza the Fraud.”

“Pippa - "So constantly and I stress, constantly being the subject of words such as cretin, moron, idiot, plankton is acceptable then ?" - I didn't say that.

"And no.......I'm not racist. In fact I'm against any form of bullying" - Glad to hear it, although I never suggested otherwise.”

“Despite the banter, Wozza1968 scratches his head and fails to comprehend. lol”

“lol ,,,,, aas i was told wen i was a nipper ,,,,, sticks and stones and all that ?????????
i dont ignore no 1 well i try not to anyways so if i missed a comment i am sorry ,,,
i just think we get robbed to much and im seeing how much help some1 really gets off certain people to start a project ????????????
have a nice day you all”

“Duuuuuhhhhhhhh!”

“harbourlites,

Hee hee now you know how we feel.”

“Flossyflathat, I know what you mean but I am sure Wozza1968 can do better. It appears to me that he makes little attempt to put forward his case for his boxing club.”

“harbourlites,
I think it`s obvious by now to everyone that Wozza makes no attempt whatsoever. Since september last year when he first joined the forum, various members have tried to explain a multitude of things to him. He either won`t or can`t read the replies and then gets abusive when we get frustrated with him.
He says he wants help to set up this club but no where on the forum does he ask for it. We have advised him on the merits of the buildings he wants to buy/rent, a disused school and a shopping centre.
We mentioned the CRB check which seems to have mysteriously been lost en route and which he got for a knock down price.
Tons of advice and because it`s not what he wants to hear, we are the nasty, abusive bullies.

When you get time try reading his forums on MP`s wages, Gas & electricity prices ( more than one) and local councillors. Should keep you amused for hours.”

“Flossflathat, I suspect if I did read Wozza1968's posting history, I would lose the will to live. lol”

“harbourlites,

I`ve just gone through a few to refresh the memory. I`m still chuckling.”

“ok ,,,, right what can i do for you harbourlites ,,,
what question/questions would you like answering im all yours son ??????????????????
as i dont want it on my conscience you losing the will to live ???????????”

“Question 1:- What is wrong with your keyboard?

Question 2:- Why is Pippa such a racialist against everyone apart from you?

Question 3:- What is ET short for?”

“nothin ,,,, dont no,,,,no idea ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????”

“Anon_Geoff

1) Operator error

2) Same answer as wozza

3) He's only got little legs

I firmly believe wozza will now protest that his legs are perfectly normal length, thank you, which will lead this thread up the garden path and straight down a blind alley.”

“no comment to be made jenho,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,lol”

“Apart from that one. That comment there. The one you just made. Aha.”

“23 months to go and counting - CRB (Crazy Rambling bull sh**ter) check came back as positive.

Got some new ideas for a cross sumo/boxing club

Got to go and practice jogging up the steps of the guildhall to the rocky theme tune - love to all my fans - Wozza Balboa”

“wozaz - are you going to stick to your guns and only employ men?

Men under retirement age?

Young men?

Is your club going to be staffed by you and a load of young men?

Fit men?

Mmm.”

“And of course your employees will need some kind of qualification. Which would make them clever. And we all know what you think clever people should be paid don't we?

Minimum wage!

So, you'll be surrounded by young, fit, male, minimum wage slaves.

Ohhh!”

“jenoh

It looks like wozza's faithful followers have pulled out of this thread and, dare I say it, you're trying to incite them back into action? I do hope you're successful, I've loved every minute of it. At times I thought my laptop would explode. When wozza started his discussions??? I wonder if he envisaged he would build up such a fan base???”

“Fan base.....not what I`d call it.”

“MJWhyatt, without malice, apart from Wozza's lapdog Pippa/CaraMia can you provide a few names?

Jenoh, your post on Wednesday, June 20 2012at 1:22AM speaks volumes.

The mind boggles. lol”

“Just out of interest Wozza1968, what is the proposed boxing clubs location? It would appear that West Hull is 'crying out' for such a club.

Of course, this is presuming that your proposal is genuine.”

“Harbourlites,

The last thing we heard was that he was trying to get a run down shopping arcade as his venue. That was after he tried to get a school that was due for demolition. Both are on or near Bransholme. Wozza never gave us any information other than his basic proposal so we are left wondering where he is in his grand scheme.

Has he been given access to a venue?
Did his CRB check ever come back and if so, did he pass?
Is he having training? As far as we know he has no boxing experience whatsoever.
If he does have experience, has he got a license?

We need to know these things. It`s keeping me awake at night (not).”

“Flossyflathat, it's my understanding that the boxing club in East Hull relocated to Stavely Road in 2011. They secured a £94,000 windfall that secured their future for 3 years.

East and Central Hull appear to be be well served with regard to Amateur Boxing, hence my question as to the location.”

“Wozza has said that he is not posting on here anymore because the people of Bransholme needed him to help them (with his boxing club).

So I am sorry Ms Flathat but you will be having lots more sleepless nights if he keeps to his word.”

“xwzzzzzzzzzz,

Did you not notice the (not) at the end of my post lol?

Harbourlites,

I know that, but obviously Wozza think the world begins and ends in Bransholme.”

“Yes of course, but it just seemed a natural ending to my comment which was in response to me thinking that maybe you missed his fond farewell to the forum.”

“Here is my spin upon the issue.

Wozza1968 has not applied for a CRB. There is no boxing club but in time he will post more garbage claiming politicians and councillors thwarted his plans.

Let's wait and see.”

“If you've got a club why hit someone with a box? Surely if the club is a heavy wood it'll be better than a box, mind you a box of large ball-bearings would hurt!”

“This thread is getting dafter (and funnier) by the minute.”

“Even without Wozza's posts. lol”

“nope im still waiting for me crb ......................................”

“Wozza1968, you have ducked my question:

by harbourIitesSunday, June 24 2012, 9:20AM
"Just out of interest Wozza1968, what is the proposed boxing clubs location? It would appear that West Hull is 'crying out' for such a club.

Of course, this is presuming that your proposal is genuine."

Dare you answer?”

“Don't know why his crb check is taking so long. Someone I know needed one for a job AFTER wozza said his had been sent off and it came last week. An enhanced one too.”

“well since i live in bransholme this is were i would like to start a boxing club there ,,,
and west hull has a couple of clubs 1 on hessle road near pikkie park .......... ok spud”

“OK, we're getting somewhere.

Who are the Boxing Clubs and are they exclusively Boxing Clubs? By that, I don't mean a Boxing group in an already established sports club.

Establishing a new Boxing Club can be a very expensive undertaking. East Hull Amateur Boxing Club moved location in 2011, thanks to a £94,000 grant that secured their future for three years.”

“i think you may be right it will take a lot of everything ,,,time/money/commitment ,,,,,,as there is nothing on bransholme (boxing wise) the nearest is the town ,,,,, that's not good enough for us”

“I believe East Hull Boxing Club is situated on Stavely Road. That's much nearer to Bransholme than Town.”

“Hmm, i wouldn't say so.”

“well wozza can prove once and for all whether or not fick people can do better at management than clever ones.

Let's hope that no one starts running around in his club with a cleaver.”

“A_M,

Actually, unless you have transport, Stavely Road is quite a distance from Bransholme. I don`t think there`s a direct bus route.”

“You could catch a 51, get off at Apollo (no relation I assume) and walk around the corner to Stavely Road, but it's quite a walk to the actual club from there.


Maybe wozza can go onto a quiz show and win the funding

http://tinyurl.com/d9cce9p

Good job he's not one of the cleaver people or he'd never stand a chance!”

“Cleaver people..... eek.... not a meat cleaver?”

“Flossy, There is also the City of Hull Boxing Club. It's located on 1st Ave on the corner of Beverley Road and Greenwood Ave. It isn't that far away from Bransholme.

I realise not everyone has a car nowadays, however, it would be the way I would accompany my son (or Daughter!) to such a venue”

“Flossyflathat.... seem to know that face. Is that you in the picture or is it.... it is. No; it couldn't be. But.... gulp! It could be.”

“Surely it wouldn't take anyone too long to get to anywhere in Hull via an 80's training montage?”

“still no sign of ittttttttttttttttttttttttt mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm”

“How long did they say it would take?”

“I now know of 3 people who have got enhanced CRBs through and they applied after wozza claims he did.”

“But what's the rush anyway? He is nowhere near getting the club fixed up yet.”

“The police check is taking up to 5 weeks at the moment. So... either Wozza`s is through a dodgy firm and he`ll have to re apply to satisfy the council or he`s failed.”

“17th May - getting on for 6 weeks.”

“by wozza1968Friday, June 29 2012, 8:10AM
"still no sign of ittttttttttttttttttttttttt mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm"

I wonder why?”

“its not a test floosy ????????????????????? aint they slow with these things ,,it makes you wonder in this day and age with computers how slow the system takes it needs speeding up a bit dunt it ???????????????”

“Wozza,

No one said it was a test. It is a check on your criminal background. If you haven`t ever commited a crime then you pass the check. It takes time because they have to do intensive searches into changes of address and name.
Considering how many people apply for this check it`s not surprising it takes time. What is surprising however is the amount of time yours is taking and the low price you paid.

Still sounds iffy to me.”

“But wozza, you want to do away with computers altogether (apart from your own) so think how much longer it would take if you had your way.”

“They are probably still trying to decipher his application.”

“You'll pass”

“sunday no post day ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,day of rest me thinks”

“`cos it`s such hard work walking to the hallway to collect the post isn`t it?”

“wozza

So what is going to happen when/if this crb check comes through? Daren't you start your plans in case you fail? You said it is a 2 year project so what is to stop you getting on with fund raising or whatever you are planning on doing?”

“Normally he would be stood in the hallway. Staring at the letterbox and panting with excited anticipation.

On Sundays he can devote more time to his first love of Gurgling (like Googling but with childlike bewilderment)”

“1 step at a time ladies ,,,first step keep the top notch people happy by having all the full stops in the right place and the t's crossed and all the i's dotted ,,,,,,then onwards and upwards ,,,
and for your information peeps i have to walk to the end of my garden to get my mail ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,*****”

“wozza

"first step keep the top notch people happy by having all the full stops in the right place and the t's crossed and all the i's dotted "

That's why it is taking so long then. All the ???????????///////////////!!!!!!!!!!!!'s are confusing them.

And when you say 'top notch' people, do you mean cleaver people or fick people?”

“CT007

Glad that I have given you something to do today, but I'm really not interested. Thanks anyway.”

“xwzzzzzzzzzzz, I am confused I have not commented on this thread since 12/06/12 and that was to, "Imagine_that", the evidence is above. Are you now arguing with an imaginary version of me?

This is very storage behaviour please seek help!”

“CT007

"This is very storage behaviour please seek help!"



What is 'storage behaviour'? You will have to explain in a bit more detail before I can seek help.”

“n o c r b y e t still never mind”

“Your means are very slender, and your waste is great.”

“I think you'll find that a CRB for a non-profit making club such as yours will cost a minimal amount like £5 per individual up to about £44.99 depending on the circumstances. Just Google "How do i get a CRB" and Bob's your uncle. I'd cancel the one you've had done woz. I think they're messing about.”

“no its in the pipe line just have to wait ,,,,,,,snail mail is just so slow ????????
why cant we have a quicker system it seems daft to me ????????????”

“What does `snail mail` have to do with it?

Is it in the post or in the pipeline?”

“Also Wozza, you do realise that if you get the go ahead, you will have to re apply next year? Every one in the system has to be CRB checked every year now which is one reason they take so long to come through

All that for something that might never happen.”

“flossy it means our post office soz floss i forgot i have to write each and everything correct for you to understand what snail mail means thanks for that i think lol,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
at least your the right hair colour flossy lol
onwards and upwards;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ; )”

“Wozza,

Don`t judge every one by your standards. I`m quite well aware of what snail mail means but you said that your CRB was in the pipeline and then blamed snail mail. Our post is very fast exept at peak times like Christmas so that can hardly be the problem.”

“Wozza

This thread is a bit like watching the Truman show. Can I just interject and say that you dont have to wait by the letterbox...Simply log onto the CRB website and track your application.

Here, let me help http://tinyurl.com/c7dauxm

I've had 2 in the space between you saying you had applied in May and now so I think you need to be chasing it up pal.”

“This is what happens when you go through a dodgy company and pay peanuts.”

“ahhhh still no sign ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,how can it be a dodgy company its for our crb's ,,,
its our coppers and government ,,are you saying there all dodgy now ?????????????????????????”

“Wozza,

When you learn to read properly, then you`ll be in a position to question me.

You obviously haven`t used the Government CRB office because of the price difference. Anyone can set up a checking service, charge you money and do a bunk.

The police, hospitals and education dept all use the Goverment office.”

“I love you like a sister floss (even though you sometimes don't get me (or poor old woz) but you'll find that some organizations aren't too hot on the once a year CRB check. Let me paste you something.... (off've the Google)..... Obviously I appreciate that there are certain orgs. that may insist on the yearly check but like a lot of things legal, a lot of these things are 'Per recommendetion' never too specific on clarification, here's the jist....

No Need to renew CRB Checks every 3 years.

Ofsted have clarified that CRB's do not need to be reviewed on a 3 year rolling programme.

Ofsted say 'The 'three year rolling programme' for all staff is a myth. There has never been a requirement for a rolling programme of three-yearly checks for staff who have unbroken service (that is, no break of three months or more).”

“*recommendation (I know you like the spellings right)”

“GC,

Why are you posting reports from ofsted in a thread about Wozza`s boxing club, he`s hardly teaching material?”

“I wonder why Wozza needs a CRB check then. Is he 'dodgy?”

“flossy

He's 'learner material' though.”

“Wonder why we haven't had our daily update?

OK it's Sunday, but when has that ever stopped wozza?”

“Thank you for your input flossy. I'm thinking what's good enough for ofsted may be good enough for a boxing club. Would've thought ofsted would have been classed as the org. that the rest follow. Always a pleasure.”

“GC,

The report you quoted gave one of it`s reasons for not needing 3 yearly checks as staff such as school cleaners not coming into direct contact with children. Running a boxing club means not only direct contact but possibly close, physical contact including shower areas.

I`m sure you would agree that this is an open invitation to anyone with a warped mind.
The CRB checks were reviewed regularly when it became apparent that just because you didn`t have a conviction 20 years ago doesn`t mean you have a clean slate now.

In certain places of employment, paricularly were you might have access to classified or confidential information, regular reviews are still carried out.”

“CRB's are not just for safeguarding children...They are also for safegaurding vulnerable adults which also have a right to access community projects.

Wozz'...Something you may want to consider if you haven't already...You'll need ramps, hoists, moving and handling training, First Aid training, siezure management training ...It's a minefield...Not literally you understand, just proverbially speaking.”

“I am surprised GC that you are not aware of the law you work with kids in ice arena which is Hull City Council .. How do you know wozza will pass, you don't really know him? Russel Grant is *hitting incase you stop pretending to be a star and start looking at them.

Rumour had it that this thread had been taken up up by William Hill. So I popped in centre and have taken odds on 10 / 1 - Wozza has previous for fighting in Bransholme Centre over a half price roast at Crawshaws and I put a cheeky side bet of 2000/1 Prescott cutting the ribbon at the opening ... it was odds on that wozza had been ripped off and would have to re apply.”

“bt13jz

Do you mind if flossy and I form a "bt13jz fan club" and stalk you around these forums?

And maybe even start calling you bt?”

“I would love a fan club and having two members will make me twice as popular as GC.

I have been called worse.. however BT may cause me a few problems though, HDM obsess with me not being allowed in HULL and if Karl Turner gets wind BT is in East Hull, he may pester me for a broadband connection with fast speeds - gratis....”

“JZ

I'm not sure about your maths. Two is twice as many as one and even if you accept that GC is a member of his own fan club then it still only counts as a half.”

“So clinical. Why can't we all go out for a jar and do it round a table? I'll even book the table. Doesn't anyone want woz to pursue his dream? (I can hear it now "Oh, so GC can afford to go out for a beer".....yawn. I'll walk and drink water.) As for being the founder member of my own fan club... got it right in one. The psychologists will tell you, if ya love yourself the rest will follow. Hell that's a theory that needs more thought. I've always been alright with myself. I AM LOVELY!”

“Thanks for the offer, but i don't want to do it round a table with you, even in a group ... your just not my type

I would like to pretend to be 'cleaver' and say that I made assumption that GC fan club was zero...

However I am now berating myself at my lack of basic skills and miscalculation of the figures. Fortunately Barclays bank are recruiting and my manipulation of figures seem to be skill set they require.

I am determined to make myself twice as popular now...

Like GC love myself a little so there is three fans
My other personality is contradictory and i hate myself - taking it back to two fans

I have my mum and pc rowan follows me (he may not be a fan though) just a police officer keen to catch up with me...

Does my dog count ...take that back ...gc has one and then i will have to find even more fans..

Wozza can we be mates? ......





PC Rowan is a follower... but maybe not a fan... which would make it four”

“Ignore the last line ....

Maths and IT seem to be very weak at the moment ... must try harder”

“198”

“199”

“200, and you view this thread because you thought some had replied...lol;-)”

“With the freedom of information act coming in to force you are all cordially invited to view my current CRB anytime. If you can't do it online, send them an email and tell them you also have my blessing. I would feel privileged.”

“The system is quite limited CTCC7 - i find three posts on the same thread is the maximum in a given time frame.... be patient and you can post a further three ....”

“embittered,

Yes I understand that, I was trying to point out that there are many levels to a CRB check, not just from an education point of view (ofsted)

Some areas of employment insist on enhanced checks right across the board with cleaners being asked to produce financial details. It goes an awful lot deeper than protecting children and vunerable adults from sexual predators.”

“still no sign ,,,,,,,,,,me thinks i shall wait till next monday and try ringing again ,,,,,,,,,taking the mickie me thinks ,,,,,,,,,,,and to true floss but the crb is suppose to be helpful for the employers?????????????????????
13jz u are right i have be a grasshopper me thinks”

“no crb today as well”

“wozza1968

Saturday, July 14 2012, 11:10PM
.
"no crb today as well"


And you didn't notice until 10 past 11 in the evening? Your postman must work late.”

“ahhhhhh sunday ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, day off for postie bum mer ,,,,,,,,,,o well roll on monday”

“Wot's a postie bum mer?

You're obsessed!”

“Everyone needs a day off. Especially the postie bum mer.

You're obsessed!”

“Dammit! Double post! Ignore the least funny. Or both. Whatever, I don't think they'll last long, but I made myself laugh which is half the battle as any good Scottish late night TV host will tell you.”

“"Posties", everywhere beware for every Sunday the postie bum mer lurks waiting to steal the chastity of your virgin post, CRB checks included, Ooo the cheek!”

“I wonder if anyone on this Forum believes that Wozza1968 has really applied for CRB. Like his imaginary boxing club, I reckon it's 'pie in the sky'.”

“Jenoh, you posted:

by jenohSunday, July 15 2012, 5:14PM
"Everyone needs a day off. Especially the postie bum mer.

You're obsessed!"

Either Wozza is illiterate or his postman is 'dodgy'.

I would think it's option one.”

“I understand that the spin for Royal Mail putting up prices was that they go further than other carriers and deliver the extra mile ... on top of this they have launched a new postie ****** service, where they will access round the back way and empty sacks in your allocated slot. As Wozza found out...Sunday service is not available.”

“How does one go about applying for the job I wonder? Maybe our resident job seeking DJ could investigate?

GCthepostiebotherer has a euphemistic ring to it.

Ring pun utterly intended.”

“The one time he needs a comma...”

“No one waits this long for a crb check to come back.

And what about his 'goodbye because I'll be busy with setting up my boxing club' post a few months ago? Surely, if he is confident that he doesn't have a dodgy past, he can start doing something else towards his boxing club? I'm sure if he was we'd be hearing about it.

And didn't our resident job seeking DJ also post a 'goodbye because I'm getting a job' thread a while ago? Wonder what is happening there?”

“xwzzzzzzzzzzz, I maintain that Colin is a bigoted attention seeker. His boxing club and CRB are imaginary. His friend the DJ is merely an attention seeker. Still I wish him luck with his quest for work.”

“maybe light at the end of the tunnel”

“A rumoured link between Wozza and Fish Trades led to them being kicked out of their current building.

Let us hope that no more innocents are caught up in his ill informed crusade.”

“Is G4S processing his application?”

“wozza - "maybe light at the end of the tunnel"

It's a train.”

“i hope his application is on track”

“Well it's Tuesday now - no update.”

“Your CRB is not in a tunnel ... it is in a vortex in another realm”

“lol come on our brilliant system get it posted
step 2 is waiting in the wings”

“and mr mouuse if u like i could always pop it down for ya to have a look ???????????????????”

“heres 1 for ya if i manage to open a boxing/community centre on brans witch boxing star shall i bug to get to come and open it ??????????????????????????
i have spoken to sam fox on twitter i might beg her to turn up so thats the fellas sorted out ,,,,,,,who would you birds like me to hassle to open da club”

“it has to be a boxer mind ???????????????????????”

“Sam fox may have had two big knock outs in her career, but it had nothing to do with boxing ... oh and you better had get your camera wozza (please refer to women at work post), Its unlikely she will be into you - though she may like your 'mits' (moobs)”

“Michael Farquaharson?”

“Muhammad Ali?”

“Henry Cooper.... before you point out the obvious I know... but there is as much chance of this happening as the club opening.

Oscar Dela Hoya - for a bit of guy candy, if he comes I will wozza

:)”

“lol i was thinking more in the lines of British boxers the ones that are alive ?????????????????”

“Michael Farquaharson was British and there has been no report of his death.”

“wozza - "lol i was thinking more in the lines of British boxers the ones that are alive "

Ah right, I understand now.

Cassius Clay?”

“Nicola Adams ...”

“bt13jz - "Nichola Adams ..."

Bzzt! Denied!

The first rule of wozzClub is, you do not talk about wozzClub.

The second rule of wozzClub is, No Birds.”

“LOL jenoh... wozz club is mint .. that will make me laugh all day

ooooo nooooo I think there was a split personality theme in this flick.... see what you have done now... see the trouble you are bringing to this thread... its back to tag team forum wrestling... quick get off subject... I can see pippa swinging her handbag round .... c xxx 7 is on the ropes and g69 is 'shadow' boxing in the corner...imagine that :)”

“pmsl”

“OK... Anybody who wants to sign up, here are your membership forms.

Please ensure they are completeed with no reading, writing or general cleaverness.”

“na i prefer face to face ,,,,,, it seems to sort the men from the boys lol”

“Colin, you posted:

by wozza1968
Thursday, July 19 2012, 8:24PM

"na i prefer face to face ,,,,,, it seems to sort the men from the boys lol"

Considering your imaginary club is for boys I would imagine that's the case. No written records? There are many other things to consider too. A CRB check alone is not sufficient.

I still believe that this is just another wozza 'attention seeking' exercise. I doubt if this project of yours will ever go ahead. If it does it will be a shambles.”

“ahhhhhh well said there fella/bird ,,,but its going to be for every 1 ,,,,,,as i have said before mr moose ,,,,i will be quite happy showing you ,,,,,,, if you like ?????????????”

“wow another week down and still waiting for da postie man ,,,well roll on monday again??????????”

“Have you done anything else to get your boxing club moving whilst waiting for your CRB?

I think subliminally you are trying to create public anticipation and followed by mass hysteria....

What do we want??? WOZZCLUB ... When do we want it???? NOW

Come on postie jog on to wozza's and hand over the awaited CRB like the final baton in the 4 x 100m relay.... with all wozza's people clapping and cheering and punching the air....... He turns to the awaiting crowd opens the envelope and it reads ... sorry most of this was not legible... please reapply and send another seven pounds........”

“no unfortunately i have to go though the system to prove i have all the paper work to get this club up and running ,,,,,this is before our council will get involved ???????
it has to be done right i myself dont want muppets turning round and saying ( have you got this and that paperwork ) it is a shame but as we live in a pc world this day and age.......
one has to have all relevant paperwork to satisfy our leaders and funders ?????

plus i want it done right as well ???????

plus i want to see what obstacles our council put in the way ,,,and by going by what has happened so far it gunna be a long process .

dont no about da name like i was thinking bransholme boxing club the ( bbc) might not like it though lol”

“Wozza

Track you application at https://secure.crbonline.gov.uk/ all you need is your application number on your paperwork. The site has been down for a bit but it reopens at 6pm tonight.

CRB is to safeguard and is the correct process. There is also a small possibility that you councillor thinks it will provide a valid reason not to have support your plans longterm....

I am looking forward to your clean crb and anticipate that the next hurdle before funding will be market research and your experience of running such a club...

Right back to taking the p1ss”

“Wozza, after all this waiting for your CRB, all the planning...let's pretend you sort everything out and are about to open your club: what do you think the odds are someone from this forum will place an official complaint with the council saying your sexist views etc make you unsuitable to work with children?

Follow up question: how do you think the council will respond?”

“He will say come on Mr Brady ... say it to my face .. lets have av it ....”

“were have i been sexest on here ????????????????”

“wozza

Calling women 'birds' is sexist

Saying that 'birds' shouldn't work so that there are more jobs for men is sexist

Hope this helps”

“Also calling a man 'Batty Boy' is Homophobic. Hope this helps too.”

“And telling a person to retire so a younger person can have their job is ageist.

And that's the hattrick, Chuckles.”

“There you go Wozza, and what a great team effort from the forum.

Wozza, repeat after me: "gud buy boxin klub".”

“well in your opinions then im all them ,,,,,,,,,,,and your saying because some 1 says things thats the end of a club ,,,,or setting 1 up ,,,,,, oh dear i seem to be at the bottom dont i ,,,,,,,,,,
oh well on wards and upwards

i shall do what all the people at the top do ,,,,,,,,,,,,
im sorry for been sexest, ageist, and all the other things i have wrote on here to offend every one on here ,,,,,,,,,,, sorted pmsl”

“but yournot at the top.....”

“Wozza, it just takes the tiniest question mark (and only one of them!!!!!!!!) for the council to not risk you being around children. There is more than enough material on this forum to raise concerns.”

“Luckily for wozza this is an anonymous forum. There is no link between his real life application and the character posting on here.

Oh... Except his face.

And now do you see why people do not put their own picture up?”

“wozza

"im sorry for been sexest, ageist, and all the other things i have wrote on here to offend every one on here ,,,,,,,,,,, sorted "

No wozza, I don't think it is. Sorted that is. In my opinion you should go through every post that you have made, see who you insulted with sexist, ageist and homophobic comments and apologise to each individual for each insulting post.”

“Ghostwriter69, he wont be able to find them, the more offensive ones have been removed by the HDM administrator.”

“g69 .. if he does it.. It will take longer than two years to get wozz club up and running :)”

“wozza

And who has the ability to do that then??????????????????”

“Anon_Geoff
.
"Luckily for wozza this is an anonymous forum. There is no link between his real life application and the character posting on here.

Oh... Except his face"

And his date of birth and his full name (when you view his profile) and the fact he lives in Bransholme and is on Twitter and Facebook, but yes, apart from that, he's anonymous.”

“yah i have my crb ,,,,ding ding round 1 done and dusted ,,,,

round 2 now GRRRRRRR TRAINING time oh well here we go ???????????????????????????????????”

“Wot training?”

“Glad to hear it Wozza.....congratulations x”

“Wozza what about the other boxing club on bransholme?”

“Pippa,

Does getting a CRB back really warrant a congratulations?”

“Flossy

After all the waiting and wonderful words of wisdom and encouragement from fellow posters, I should say so, yes”

“yeh 2 jobs down now and booked ,,,,,here we go again ,,,,waiting time ?????????????????????????”

“well had a meeting booked with a cllrs ,,,,, 1 never turned up ,,,,, now isnt that bad ??????”

“wow old me booked on courses ,,,, all this work its a massive task to just set a club up ,,,,, but never mind all the t's are crossed ,, and all the dots in the right place all spell checked and off we go ???????????????????????????? and not allowed to use these ( ? ) its just not cricket ?????? lol”

“wozza please respond are you aware that there is another boxing club on Bransholme?”

“no there aint ,,,,”

“Kids boxing 3.30 - 4.30pm Boxing tuition at Bransholme Community Arts Enterprise, Dorchester Primary School, Bransholme cost £1 per session

Is this a knock out blow?"”

“er no its not up and running ,,,, as i got off my backside and went to have a look ,,,,,
as i said before no there aint nothing on brans to do with boxing ,,,,,,,,,
go ave a look for yourself instead of believing what you read get off ya ars. and check first before you spout utter rubbish



thanks”

“Why did they advertise it in HDM then?”

“Just trying to be helpful ...”

“Lucy Lion Spouting utter rubbish? Check this link then and read the bit at the bottom

http://tinyurl.com/8t4cg9b

They were running a five week course - test marketing perhaps? you better get a move on with your training before some one beats you to it ...”

“I am a qualified FULL ABA coach and have 10 years experience training with the Army boxing teams. I am without a club at the moment and would love to get involved.”

“Well done Wozza! It lucks like fings are realy movving forewards!”

“Wozza is New 'going for gold' boxing Academy setting up on BHE anything to do with you? I heard that it was to be funded by HCC & NHS”

“waltonandie1,,,, me mail thing has gone down at the mo so i have had to set another account up ,,,,,,,
i dont want to put my details on here as you get to much grief off people ????????????????????????
is there a number you could leave on here as i could get in touch that way ????????????????
please .............ta”

“wozza - oi! You're impersonating me with that profile picture.

Secondly, how does the logic work of you not giving any personal details to avoid grief but then asking someone to put a phone number on here????????????????????

Parp.”

“Wozza1968 - has your account been barred?”

“ok 69 when its up and running u shall ave da number untill then ,,,soz chaps and chapets no number yet ?????????????? jobs a good un”

“Wozza, E-mail is

f-lips@hotmail.co.uk

I will give you my number when you e-mail pal.”

“Be careful woz that email is suspicious for a burley hairy boxing solider :)”

“That boxing themed private function suite will pe berfect for barn dances, bar mitvahs and barbecues. Put me down for the DJ job woz, I'll bring me spare rig....”