ON THE darkest days, Sherrie Rhodes wanted to go to sleep and never wake up.

Sherrie spent nine months in the grip of postnatal depression when the youngest of her three children was just six months old.

Unable to lift herself off her sofa or leave her home, she thought her husband Sean and children would be better off without her.

"There were times when I thought if I was dead, it would be so much easier for everyone," she says.

"My children didn't have a mum, not really, for nine months and my husband had to run the house and go to work because I just couldn't do anything."

However, Sherrie is among thousands of women whose lives have been transformed by Willow, the women's centre in North Hull.

Willow – Women Into Life, Leisure Or Work – opened in 1994, offering a lifeline to women denied life's opportunities in Hull and the East Riding.

As well as training in life skills, the centre offers numeracy and literacy courses and university foundation courses in a range of subjects including psychology and counselling.

More than that, Willow offers them hope.

Today, as the sun streams through the windows, women of all ages and social backgrounds attend maths and crafts classes while their children play in the crèche.

While many, but not all, of the women have struggled through life traumas, this is a bright and happy place, brimming with optimism.

Sherrie was one of the first women to attend Willow's outreach courses back in 2007. Just three years later, she is now a volunteer doula, helping women through the late stages of pregnancy, birth and beyond. So far, Sherrie, 30, has helped seven women, bringing three babies into the world.

"I saw an article in the Mail about volunteer doulas for the Goodwin Trust and I went to an opening evening," she says. "Someone from the hospital said having another woman present at the birth to give support can help with postnatal depression and that clicked with me.

"If I can help prevent another woman going through what happened to me, then I'll do it."

Sherrie has just been named Outstanding Learner Of The Year by the National Institute Of Adult Continuing Education, representing Yorkshire and Humber at a prestigious ceremony in London. She has also won the "Overcoming Barriers" award, presented by Humberside Learning Consortium.

Sherrie was diagnosed with postnatal depression after a family holiday to Turkey in 2006.

"Everything was great for the first week then, all of a sudden, I just felt terrible," she says. "Sean looked after the kids because I couldn't eat, get up or get washed."

The family returned home to Orchard Park, but Sherrie didn't get better.

"I didn't have a clue what was wrong with me," she says. "I wasn't able to do anything with the kids.

"I saw a community psychiatric nurse and when she said I had postnatal depression, I thought 'Thank God for that' because there was a name for how I was feeling and it wasn't just me.

"It was like I was shut off from the world, living in a bubble. My husband had to have loads of time off work because there were days when I woke up and begged him not to leave me."

Finally, after a range of treatments from hypnosis to cognitive behaviour therapy, Sherrie found the strength to help herself.

"It was time to stop looking for miracles and get up and do something for myself," she says. "The only person who could make me better was myself."

She was put in touch with Willow, next to Hall Road Primary School, and began to win the fight against her illness.

"I started coming along to confidence-building and aromatherapy courses at Willow," says Sherrie.

"It was a massive thing for me to walk through the door the first time because I was going into a room with people I didn't know. I asked myself if I was prepared to do this or did I still want to lie on the couch.

"Coming here turned out to be the best thing I've ever done for myself."

Centre co-ordinators Sylvia Kilvington and Jacquie Newman beam with pride as Sherrie talks about the changes in her life.

"We are just so proud of her," says Sylvia. "Sherrie is the ethos of what we do here at Willow. It has been such a privilege to be alongside side her on her journey."

Sherrie has rebuilt her life and is hoping to train as a midwife when her children are older.

"It's a lot happier in my house these days," she says. "My kids are just amazing and my husband has been fantastic through this.

"We do so much together as a family. We have an allotment and we all get stuck in, getting dirty, and we love to go camping.

"I see things in a different light after what we've all been through.

"I couldn't have done any of this without Willow. If I hadn't come here, I don't know what I would have done."

Links

Willow

www.willowhull.org.uk

Postnatal Depression

www.pni.org.uk